Love

"Each one of us here today will at one time look upon a loved one who is in need and ask the same question; We are willing to help, Lord, but what, if anything, is needed? For it is true we can seldom help those closest to us. Either we don't know what part of our selves to give or, more often than not, the part that we have to give is not wanted. And so it is those who we live with and should know who elude us. But we can still love them... We can love completely without complete understanding." - A River Runs Through It.
There is nothing more upsetting than reaching out to someone you love, who clearly needs help, only to be rejected. I know this feeling better than perhaps one should.
I am consumed by the struggles of the ones I love the most, and always am trying to figure out how to help them. The answer that I am finally getting beat into my thick skin is that there is no answer. You simply can't help people. You can only love them. You can only offer yourself and a hand for them to hold. If they choose to, they might take your hand. More often than not, they turn away completely and pretend that they never saw your hand in the first place. Pride is a heavy stone that will crush and destroy anything in its path.
People will do only what they choose to do. I have given up praying for help as well. Not because I have given up on God, but because I am beginning to learn that it is not up to the Lord. It is up to the person. Sometimes, they believe that there is nothing wrong and other times they know it, but deny it.
All I know is that no one is perfect or above problems. I have my own, so do you. How we deal with them makes the difference.
I have made a lot of mistakes trying to help people I love. I have said things in anger that I wished I had not. Things I can never take back, only apologize for having said. I have become frustrated to the boiling point searching for understanding, only to remain in the dark feeling angry and guilty. Although, my greatest mistake has been taking it personal. Like the whole thing is somehow my fault.
I know that it isn't my fault, but because I love them it becomes my burden too.
I am learning that I can't fix many of these things, even though it hurts extremely bad to admit.
I am learning that sometimes there is nothing that we can do, we can only try. I still refuse to give up and ignore that there is a problem, even though I may be the only one.
I am learning that you don't have to understand completely to love.

I am learning that maybe all I can really do is Love.